On love, sex and fleeting moments

There are many thinkers that consider sex to be the coming together of self and other. I disagree. There is never any coming together of self and other, but sometimes we forget about ourselves. This is love. That moment when we no longer matter, and the only thing that does matter is an other. This other can take on many forms, it may be the subliminal, as in the humility we face when we stare nature squarely in the face, or it may be another human, when we care so passionately about them and their welfare that we forget our own needs and wants. Traditionally we recognize the love between the parent and its offspring as among the strongest. It is easy to draw out the selflessness that occurs in such cases.

Sex on the other hand is generally about power. The goal of sex, is for most, your orgasm, your climax. Orgasm feels good, so does heroin, so does a hot shower, and so does a long piss. Often there is a satisfying of the ego involved. You get what you want, you manipulate another into playing along, maybe there’s an exchange and you both, in a rational way, get what you want. There is a mastery of one over nature, and one over an other at play.

You think I’m nuts. What is this “love” you speak of. Sex is great and I feel like a king when I do it. Anyone that has ever had really good casual sex and really good caring sex won’t disagree. The latter is ineffably better. Try it sometime; find someone you care so deeply about that during sex all you can focus on is your partner’s health and orgasm. Ideally, if the love is mutual, all they’ll be worrying about is yours. I assure you it’s worth it. Most interestingly, you’ll cherish this person with or without the sex, and the moments of ecstasy and ‘happiness’ won’t begin and end with a strange expression on your face, and a release of bodily fluids. Just looking into their eyes should do the trick, and there won’t be a mess to clean up afterwards.

(This was brief, but I’m pretty sure I’m onto something here. But there is a problem: What of submission? Is this healthy? Or is this something else?)